Transitions

My life started out in a way some may consider unfortunate. I was a complete accident, spawned from teenage hormones to a father I'd never know, and a mother who spent her life as a drug addict. My family never had much money, though I never went without anything. My relatives, as well as my mother's friends, were definitely living in poverty and was something I was exposed to continuously in my childhood.

In school from second grade on I was teased for being a sissy, a girl, a fag. Thankfully I never had any physical bullying done to me, but the psychological aspects took years to overcome. Even now I run into issues where it's hard for me to accept myself and feel confidence in who I am.

As an adult I've had heartbreaks, lost loved ones, lost jobs, forced to rely only on myself...

My point to say all of this is I spent years feeling sorry for myself. I didn't understand why I felt I was a good person putting good out in the world, only to get these situations thrown at me over and over again. Somewhere I had gotten the idea that I was owed some big payoff for everything I had went through, and nowhere in my life was I seeing this coming true.

It was last year in 2012 when everything in my life changed. I'd been granted a job with a salary I'd never experienced before. I thought finally here I was getting what was due to me. Yet all I found was more stress and unhappiness. Then out of nowhere I lost that job.

In the few moments before I found out for sure if I'd been fired or not, I experienced what I'd call my first glimpse into the journey I was about to set out on. I just sat and felt this amazing, calming peace settle down over my entire body like I'd never felt before. I just knew everything was going to be alright. And it was. From that job loss a space was created in my life and thinking that allowed me to explore my true self for the first time. The ripples of that moment are still going through my life, teaching me, pushing me, helping me grow.

One of the biggest lessons I learned was that I had to realize that everything that has happened, is happening, and will happen is for my greatest benefit. Making that choice to stop seeing things negatively and begin reacting positively. To stop thinking I was owed something and begin questioning what it is I could do to help the world around me. To trust completely in the Universe that I would be taken care of and led down the right paths.

So with that thought pattern I looked back at my life with new understanding. My hardships didn't break me, they made me stronger, taught me how to overcome. I learned how to relate to so many different types of people with compassion and respect. Gave me the experience to go forward and help heal those that go through similar situations that get them down in a completely unselfish and loving way.

Each day is a new day where I make a conscious choice to step out with an optimistic outlook and a smile on my face knowing everything is going to go just as it should. Each day it gets easier and easier as it's proven to me that I'm right and goodness flows into my life more and more.

So try it for yourself. It may seem silly to you, but your reaction to life events is what sets the course in either a positive or negative way, so why not choose positive? Try it for a while and watch how differently people respond to you, and you to them. Watch the good energy flow into your life as you put it back out in the world.

Just love, just smile, just be happy.